This was the only apple left on my little espallied apple tree. The squirrels, deer and herbivores of all sizes got all the rest. The worst part is, this apple tree is exactly four feet from my back porch. Unfortunately, I can’t stand watch all day at my back porch waiting for marauders.
Life is full, and busy. Things and people fall through the cracks in my scheduling resolve. I let people down, and I feel guilty. I feel alone. No one but me can be the me I need to be . . . and that one me isn’t enough.
I’m not enough.
When I think these thoughts I remember that not being enough is actually a good thing. Jesus CHOOSES the weak things of the world, the despised, the rejected, so that there won’t be any confusion about who is doing his good work.
Okay, so what if I’m a loser? I’d rather be a loser who knows how to apologize and point people to the one who can take their failures and make something beautiful, than to have everything under control.
Really. I would.
Okay, I’d rather have everything under control in my own selfish way. But somehow, someway, God’s got even this under control; and though my failures are painful to me, and to others, there is a peace in knowing that he knows–and wants–to use me in spite of myself.
1 Corinthians 1:26-29